One day, I will have my own office to work in, in a little farmhouse out in Parker, maybe with a few wolf dogs running around in the backyard. I will have a fancy new laptop and a big glass desk with a perfect desk chair and a velvet sofa under the window. My home will be amazing – it will be the perfect floor plan, have the perfect finishes. I will have filled every corner with amazing furniture that reflects the amazing interior designer I am, making amazing instagram photos, which I would definitely post every day.
But then I think back to just this morning, when I was reading for hours, just sitting next to Jason on our giant cream colored couch. I was so content, so happy, right where I was.
There really is always a “next” in life. Sometimes it motivates me to move forward and keep inspired and passionate. Sometimes, it keeps me from enjoying where I am, where I am at, and then it makes me unsatisfied in me. I don’t need my own office to be passionate about what I do. I don’t need a perfect house to prove I am a good designer.
Though sometimes it is difficult to keep positive and motivated, I only have to look around and feel content – to be thankful.
I feel so lucky to have found a job that I can do at home, but also one I absolutely love. I love my clients – I love being inspired by them, by their ideas; I love interior design – when everything just fits its place. I love the beginning of a project, when it is just building speed, and everything is possible; I love the end of a project, when everything becomes reality; I love every bit of the entire process.
My little apartment, my limping old laptop, my lack of storage, none of this matters, because that is not what makes where I am really home. The fact that this is where I do my job just helps to define the space around me. But also, having Jason here with me, being familiar with each piece of furniture we have (or don’t have), and every time I walk these halls, open a door, or glance over a messy room, my little space becomes a little more mine.
Because it is where my life happens.
It is where I discover more about myself.
This is where I make memories, and a place I call mine.
No home is perfect. “Next” is not always a part of my reality. But creating a place for us to live life here is what home is.